Topenga Ataata
Kupu Tūpato
Hit it
– Ka patua
The bridesmaids wanted a celebration
– I hiahia nga wahine marena hou ki te whakanui
So we took a trip, bachelorette vacation
– Na ka haere mātou ki te haerenga, ki te hararei bachelorette
‘Cause we know she needs one
– ‘No te mea e mohio ana tatou e hiahia ana ia tetahi
A break from Matthew
– He wehenga mai I A Mataio
Just kidding, Matt
– Just kidding, Matt
We’re glad she has you
– E hari ana mātou kei a koe
We’re out, the shots are flowing, yeah
– Kei waho, kei te rere nga pupuhi, ae
Guys on the dance floor grooving, yeah
– Ko ngā tāne i te papa kanikani e rere ana, yeah
We say, “No thanks, she’s taken,” yeah
– Ka mea atu mātou, “Kāore he mihi, kua tangohia ia,” ae
Sing it
– Waiata atu
Now she’s with a hot guy, but he looks gay
– Inaianei kei te noho ia ki tētahi tangata wera, engari he āhua tāne ia
Heard his name is Domingo
– I rongo ko Domingo tōna ingoa
Second location, maybe he’s bi
– Te wāhi tuarua, tērā pea ko ia a bi
Still dancing with Domingo
– Kei Te kanikani tonu me Domingo
Third location, fully straight, fully touching Domingo
– Te wāhi tuatoru, tino tika, tino pa Ki Domingo
“I can’t wait to be his wife”
– “E kore e taea e ahau te tatari ki te waiho i tona wahine”
She’s pointing to Domingo
– E tohu ana ia Ki A Domingo
So quick question, who’s Domingo?
– He pātai tere, ko Wai A Domingo?
Oh, just this random guy we met, I told you about him
– Aue, tenei taata tupono noa tutaki matou, korerotia e ahau ki a koutou e pā ana ki a ia
I’m positive you did not
– He pai ahau kihai koe i
In the bathroom, we take her outside
– I roto i te wharepaku, ka kawea ia e mātou ki waho
She says, “Don’t worry, we won’t cross the line”
– Ka mea ia, “Kaua e manukanuka, e kore matou e whiti i te raina”
“Think of your fiancé”
– “Whakaaro ki tō kaumeahine”
She says, “Good reminder”
– Ka mea ia, “he whakamahara pai”
Hands me her ring
– Homai ki ahau tana mowhiti
Then we can’t find her
– Na e kore e taea e tatou te kitea ia
You took off your ring? Is this true?
– I tangohia e koe tō mowhiti? He pono tenei?
Well, I just didn’t want to lose it in the hot tub
– Kaore au i hiahia ki te ngaro i roto i te hot tub
What hot tub?
– He aha te hot tub?
Now we’re back in the house, in the hot tub
– Na, kua hoki mai mātou ki te whare, ki te kaukau wera
She’s there with Domingo
– Kei Reira ia me Domingo
Ask us to leave, get a hotel
– A ani ia tatou ki te waiho, te tiki i te hotera
She’s vibing with Domingo
– Kei Te piri ia Ki A Domingo
You asked them to leave and get a hotel?
– I tono koe ki a rātau kia haere ki te tiki i tētahi hōtera?
Shh you’re missing it
– Kei te ngaro koe
At the Marriott, googling Domingo
– I Te Marriott, Googling Domingo
Just to make sure he’s not psycho
– Kia mohio ai ehara ia i te psycho
But he’s actually a doctor and randomly a model
– Engari he tākuta ia he tauira noa iho
And he volunteers with weird sick animals
– A ka mahi ia ki ngā kararehe mate kē
Is the point of this song just that Kelsey cheated on me all weekend?
– Ko Te take o tēnei waiata i tinihanga ai a Kelsey ki ahau i te mutunga wiki katoa?
No, the point is, it’s Espresso
– Kāore, ko te take, he Espresso
You’re not even listening to the lyrics
– Kāore koe e whakarongo ki ngā kupu
That’s all I’m listening to
– Ko te mea anake e whakarongo ana ahau
The next day, she said, “Nothing happened”
– I te rā i muri mai, ka mea ia, “Kāore he mea i tupu”
They talked all night about you, Matthew
– I kōrero rātau i te pō katoa mō koe, E Mataio
Then at brunch, she just starts crying
– Kātahi i te kai, ka tīmata ia ki te tangi
We ask her, “Why?”
– Ka ui atu mātou ki a ia, “he aha?”
She says, “I’m just so tired”
– Ka mea ia, “he tino ngenge ahau”
We say, “Take a nap”
– Ka mea matou, ” Tangohia he nap”
She says, “I’m not that kind of tired”
– Ka mea ia, ” ehara ahau i te ahua o te ngenge”
Okay, I need answers now about you
– Ok, e hiahia ana ahau whakautu inaianei e pā ana ki a koutou
And whoever this Domingo guy is
– A ko wai tēnei Tangata Domingo
And not for nothing, but the rhyme scheme has gone completely out the window
– A ehara i te mea noa iho, engari kua tino puta te kaupapa rerenga ki waho o te matapihi
Okay look, I’m sorry I met someone
– Titiro pai, kei te pouri ahau i tutaki ahau ki tetahi
I connected with
– I hono ahau ki
But Domingo is in the past
– Engari Ko Domingo i mua
Kelsey, I’m here
– Kelsey, kei konei ahau
See now, if this is Domingo, I’m gonna be pissed
– Na, ki Te Mea Ko Domingo tenei, ka riri ahau
Hey Matt, came all this way
– Hey Matt, i haere mai i tenei ara katoa
Had to explain, direct from Domingo
– I ki te whakamārama, tika i Domingo
Kelsey’s a friend, she’s like my sis
– He hoa a Kelsey, he rite ia ki taku sis
But we did hook up though
– Engari i piri tonu mātou
What? Why would you guys tell me this through song?
– He aha? He aha koe i korero ai ki ahau i roto i te waiata?
I hope we can still be friends
– Ko te tūmanako ka taea tonu e tātou te noho hoa
